drv control

Not sure who is controlling who here. I got a drv so that I would not miss any of my favorite shows while I was at college, work or studying. Now, I am unemployed and I have graduated. I had a lot of time on my hands, so much time that I found tons of shows that I wanted to record and save for later to watch. Then I got busy. My shows added up and I was running out of room to record more shows. I needed to watch the shows or delete them. Though I was extremely tired, I spent the last few days staying up until 3am or so watching the shows. The drv was supposed to make me more free and allow me to go about my life without worrying about missing shows. Now I am missing life to watch my shows.

buy me love

Figured it out today. My brother is trying to buy his son's love. My brother makes me mad a lot but this recent thing really makes me mad. My other nephew had a birthday but there was no present from my brother (this other nephew's uncle). Bro claimed he had no money for a present. So, a few days later, my nephew (my bro's son) is at my house, being babysat. Bro comes to pick his son up. Bro brings $30 worth of brand new toys. This sets me off but I say nothing. What the ***** is that about? How dare my bro get so much for his kid for no good reason when he has a nephew going without a birthday present. If said nephew (the bday boy) was my son, I don't think I'd ever forgive my bro. That is just uncalled for. You can't claim poverty and then spend money for no reason. So, anyway....the reason my bro spends money on his son is that he feels guilty for having a job (which he needs to support his son). I understand this guilt because I had it for a year after getting my dog. I think the guilt is bigger with a kid though. I still don't think that means Bro's son gets tons of toys (for no reason) and nephew goes without. How about spending some of that $30 on the birthday boy? Conclusion: Sometimes Bro is a big freakin' jerk. Other conclusion: Sharing feelings on here is nice and helps a bit but I think I'd have felt better if I got to scream at bro at least a little bit.

I hate you, can you babysit my kids?

Believe it or not, these words didn’t come out of my sister’s mouth. But I bet she was thinking it. We had a fight. I was watching her kids at my house. When I was watching them, they were having some sibling rivalry issues. I told them there would be time-outs for any kid who wasn’t being nice to others. They played really nice until my sister came home. When she was home, the oldest was mean to his younger brother. I told him to sit on the couch for a time out. My sister said I couldn’t discipline her kid now that she was home. She said it was ok for him not to have a time out because you can’t give a kid a time out every time they do something wrong. Says who??? What dumb rule is that??? How else do you teach them correct behavior (respect in this case)? So, we started fighting. It ended with her saying I’d make a horrible parent and me saying that the fact that she doesn’t discipline her kids is incredible ridiculous to me. Anyway, we didn’t speak for several days, over a week actually. I told my friends that I was not calling my sister. I was mad at her and I can be more stubborn. Also, I knew she’d call me first. She’d need a babysitter at some point, even one who she thinks would apparently make a horrible parent. As predicted, my phone rings one day and it was my sister. She needed a babysitter. I played nice and didn’t tell her she was freakin’ unbelievable for only calling me for babysitting. Sometimes I can be nice.

Girl / Lady / Woman / Female

I wanted to share some information with you about myself but I was stuck on how to do it. I wrote 'I am a 27 year old female'. I didn't like the word 'female', it seemed so medical. Then I wrote, 'I am a 27 year old woman'. I erased that too, feels so old. I am simple and fun loving, not some uptight business woman or something like that. Lady seemed like the next choice but was too prissy. The only other word I could think of was 'girl' but I certainly should have outgrown that label by now. Even if kids are always asking me if I am an adult or how come I am not a "real" grownup (more on this another time).



So, here's what I came up with............ I am 27 years old, and for now, I refuse to categorize myself with the terms currently available here in the US. Maybe in the future, I will feel more like a 'woman' or I'll want to be more 'lady'-like but for now those just aren't me. Maybe others feel this way, maybe others don't. Either way, it doesn't matter to me.